That Would Be Enough
by MsLane
Summary: The logical part of her mind is telling her what she already knows. She had been wearing it, just as she always is wearing it. She had been wearing it and had been out of the house. She had left with it on. These things that she knows make it harder for her to accept that it's missing now.


As she searched, her movements were frantic.

It had to be here.

It just had to be.

"Where," Aubrey starts, digging through the socks she just dumped out onto the floor, "the fuck." She continues in a mutter to herself as she stands back up to overturn the rest of her bedroom.

The logical part of her mind is telling her what she already knows. She had been wearing it, just as she always is wearing it.

She had been wearing it and had been out of the house.

She had left with it on.

These things that she knows make it harder for her to accept that it's missing now.

"Come on Posen. Get it together."

She straightens her back and stands with her hands on her hips in the middle of the chaos that is her room, shuts her eyes and takes a deep breath. And try as she might, it does nothing to calm her mind, body and spirit.

She forcefully lets out a breath; a breath that was meant to let out all the negativity and focus her, but is one that only served to wind her up further.

Aubrey's face crumples.

"I'm so sorry." A quiet low voice says from behind her.

Quickly sniffing back the tears, Aubrey shakes her head and faces the voice, "No, no don't be. It's okay."

Stacie hums softly as she steps closer to Aubrey, her face solemn, "It just doesn't really seem to be okay."

Aubrey's lower lip trembles traitorously, but she resolutely holds her ground, "It's fine. I'm fine."

Stacie smiles at her sadly, and steps around Aubrey towards the bureau, "You know that I know the word 'fine' doesn't actually _mean_ fine when you use it. I didn't just meet you last night."

Aubrey rolls her eyes and quickly strides over to her nightstand to grab a Kleenex now that Stacie's back is to her.

"You say that every single time I use the word."

Stacie, who had been peering at the mess of things atop the bureau, turns towards Aubrey now and nods, "Yeah, I know. And I'll keep saying it until you realize you don't have to pretend around me."

"It's not important." Aubrey quickly interjects, shaking her head as she balls up the Kleenex, still unused.

Stacie frowns, her eyes finding Aubrey's, "Isn't it?"

Aubrey inhales sharply, her breath catching in her throat, her stomach clenching as her eyes suddenly and all at once fill with tears, "God, yes it is. It is Stace, and I can't find it."

She drops down onto the bed, tears making their tracks down her cheeks.

Stacie nods sadly, "I know 'brey. I know you can't, and I'm so sorry."

Aubrey shakes her head, and now that the tears have started to flow, she can't stop them, "I've been so careful with it."

She needs Stacie to believe her. It's imperative that Stacie believes her.

Nodding, Stacie steps closer to Aubrey, "I know babe, I know you have been."

Aubrey bites her lip, crossing her arms in front of her body holding herself, "I'm sorry."

The words, so quiet that if a breeze were to pass just then, it would have carried the words away, are loud enough for Stacie. She hears the words just fine.

"Please don't apologize 'brey. Look, I'll help you look for my necklace... _your_ necklace."

Stacie starts to take a step closer to Aubrey and then changes course and heads towards the other nightstand.

Taking a deep breath Aubrey reaches out a hand and then lets it drop down onto the bed, "Don't…Stacie it's-"

Stacie looks over at her then and Aubrey, her eyes despondent, lifts a shoulder in a half shrug and quietly continues, "It's not in here. It's not…no matter how badly I want it to be."

Stacie gives her a small, knowing, heartbreaking smile, "I know." She sits down beside her on the bed.

Aubrey nods, "Of course you do."

It's quiet for a moment before Aubrey asks, "Do you happen to know where it actually is? Because that would be great."

Quirking her lips slightly, Stacie shakes her head, "No such luck babe."

Aubrey squeezes her eyes shut and lets out a shuddery breath, "Can you stay?"

"Aubrey…" Her name is a caress, soft and warm.

A knock interrupts the rest of the sentence.

"Aubrey?" Chloe calls into the room gently as she pokes her head through the door.

Blinking her eyes open, taking in her empty room, Aubrey turns to face Chloe, "Yes?"

Slowly approaching her best friend, Chloe reaches for her hand and sits down in front of her, "Are you okay?"

Aubrey's eyes fill with more tears, her lower lip trembling even worse than earlier, and barely chokes out the words, "I can't find Stacie's necklace."

Chloe squeezes her hand, "Sweetheart-"

Shaking her head, Aubrey pulls her hand out of Chloe's grasp, "Please don't start. It's important to me, and it's not in here. I've looked and I _need_ it. I need it, it's all I-"

"Aubrey," Chloe starts but is interrupted again.

"I just need to retrace my steps. I've got to retrace them exactly."

Chloe gently grasps both of Aubrey's hands and tugs on her, eyes meeting Aubrey's, "You were talking to her again."

Aubrey stops moving completely, her breath not coming easy.

"I know that- I know how challenging it's been, and I know there's no way for anything to replace or even come close to replacing-"

Aubrey's shoulders start to shake as she cries silently, and interjects, "I don't want anything to replace her."

"No…no of course not. But it's not…Aubrey it's not healthy, it can't be healthy how often you…I mean you really think she's here. You talk to her out loud as if she were still-"

"I fucking know she's not alive." Aubrey growls out through her tears, her bloodshot eyes fierce, "I know she's gone. But it helps, _she_ helps. Who are _you_ to question and ridicule my coping mechanism?"

Chloe squeezes her hands, "I'm not ridiculing. I'm on your side here Aubrey. I just want to help. I don't like seeing you like this. I don't like seeing you hurting."

Aubrey says nothing as she sits there with her hands in Chloe's having her heart feel like it's being further crushed all over again as Chloe continues speaking to her gently.

"It's too quiet." Aubrey says softly suddenly, her voice heavy with grief.

Chloe stops speaking immediately, rubbing her thumbs across the back of Aubrey's hands.

Aubrey shakes her head slightly, "Nothing…nothing fills in the silence. No matter what I do, or who I'm with, there's this quiet that used to be filled with her."

She takes in a shuddering breath, her lungs feeling like they're burning as she does, "She's gone and it was too soon. Way too soon, and I'm not ready to stop seeing her. I'm not ready to have to stop picturing her near. I don't want to have to say goodbye all over again. Especially not…Especially not when I've lost her necklace too. I've lost another part of her and it's quieter than ever."

Her tears start up again, taking over her ability to speak, her throat constricting, her tears blurring her vision.

"Aubrey…oh Aubrey, Aubrey."

Chloe reaches for her and pulls her closer, wrapping her arms around her and slowly rocking her, quietly shushing her.

* * *

"Aubrey…Aubrey!"

Aubrey's eyes blink open suddenly, quickly sitting up in bed, blinking away tears.

"Finally! God baby, what kinda dream were you-"

Stacie's words are cut short. Aubrey's arms are around her neck, breathing her in and holding her tight.

Stacie, though confused, holds her closer, rubbing her back and gently massaging the back of her neck, "Hey now…hey, I've got you 'brey. You're okay."

Aubrey quietly whispers against her neck, "I thought I lost you."

Stacie tightens her grip on Aubrey, "You haven't. You haven't lost me, I'm right here."

Nodding against her neck, Aubrey whispers, "Yes you are. You're here." She kisses her neck and buries herself further into Stacie's arms.

Stacie carefully settles back down in bed, carefully pulling Aubrey down with her, cradling her in her arms, tucking her under her chin, "It was just a dream babe."

Aubrey nods against her chest, relaxing and breathing her in, yet her hands are still clutching at her keeping her close, "I know…I just don't even like the thought of _ever_ not having you."

Stacie smiles softly against the top of her head, lightly scratching Aubrey's back, "I don't like the thought of ever being without you either."

"Oh good. That's good, because you're stuck with me."

Stacie chuckles lowly, and pulls her closer still, "Oh I'm definitely a fan of being stuck with you. I'm not planning on going anywhere."

Aubrey nods against her chest, and presses her ear to listen to her heartbeat.

"I love you," she follows this with a kiss to her chest just over her heart.

Stacie gently squeezes Aubrey and kisses the top of her head, "I love you too 'brey."

Aubrey takes in a deep breath and feels her whole entire body relax against Stacie.


End file.
